‘We’re officially en-GAY-ged!’: Vermont’s first openly trans lawmaker engaged at White House Respect for Marriage Act ceremony
Vermont state Rep. Taylor Small (D), the legislature’s first openly transgender lawmaker, got engaged this week to her partner of nearly four years, Carsen Russell, in Washington just moments after a historic measure to safeguard marriage equality was signed into law.
“We’re officially en-GAY-ged!,” Small captioned a post with photos of the couple’s engagement on the South Lawn of the White House. Behind them, the South Portico is lit in the rainbow colors of the LGBTQ pride flag.
The Respect for Marriage Act signed into law by President Biden on Dec. 13 repeals the Defense of Marriage Act, the 1996 law defining marriage for federal purposes as a union between one man and one woman, and requires state recognition of legal same-sex and interracial marriages.
States are not required to individually legalize same-sex marriages, however, and constitutional amendments or statutes prohibiting those unions remain on the books in more than 30 states, though none of them is enforceable under protections established by a 2016 Supreme Court decision legalizing same-sex marriage nationwide.
In an interview with The Hill on Friday, Russell said he initially intended to propose to Small at the end of the month at the Vermont State House in Montpelier, since the couple first locked eyes at a dive bar in the state capital, where Small was performing as her drag persona, Nikki Champagne. But he pivoted once he and Small were invited to Washington to attend a signing ceremony for the Respect for Marriage Act.
“When the opportunity comes up to propose at the White House, I feel like you kinda have to take advantage of that moment,” Russell said.
On the drive down to D.C. from Vermont, Small joked that the event would have been a great place for Russell to propose, unaware that a rose gold engagement ring set with diamonds and a deep purple amethyst was hidden away in her partner’s overnight bag.
“Oh wow, what a missed opportunity!,” Russell had slyly responded.
After crowding onto the South Lawn with roughly 2,000 other attendees to watch the Respect for Marriage Act be signed into law, Russell said he led Small to a spot with a clear view of the White House porch and asked a bystander to take their photo.
“Next thing I know, Carsen is getting down on one knee and pulling out this ring box,” Small said. “I was shocked and also thought it was a joke at first because I really didn’t believe he had had a ring or that he could keep such a wonderful secret for so long.”
“I swear I could not have ripped my glove off fast enough for him to put the ring on,” she said. “It was everything I could have dreamed of and more.”
Small said she hopes her and Russell’s love story inspires other LGBTQ people to both live as their authentic selves and “experience authentic joy.”
“Transness as it currently is painted in political rhetoric is seen as a bad thing and as a negative aspect of one’s identity,” she said. “But I really see it as a gift and a privilege and being able to genuinely and authentically connect with others.”
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